The Journey Continues

I was brought on a journey last week - one that only God is capable of planning and executing. When I last wrote, I had reached my limit. My compassion was rapidly diminishing. My desire to escape was escalating. My sense of desperation was at a peak. Thankfully, God has gracefully brought me back around, reminding me of what it means to be a citizen of God's Kingdom.

So many people reached out last week, offering helpful feedback, encouragement, and ideas. A former colleague reminded me of how public bathrooms are hard to find in any urban area - even Starbucks requires a key. She proposed that we somehow figure out how to provide bathrooms for our unhoused neighbors around us.

A former parishioner reminded me of who I am and more importantly, whose I am. Kristin wrote, I have NO idea what you are going through my dear and the turmoil inside regarding the unhoused. I feel your torment with the safety of the church, the liability, the nuisance...but I also feel your heart aching for those that are bound by addiction and poverty. A question comes to mind. How do we as Christians treat the unhoused when they enter the church? Is it any different than we treat them on the outside of the church. They need to be hearing your "perky" sermons, they need to know a Jesus that is a greater high than any drug, they need to know a love that is pure and steadfast. Why do they come to the steps---is it merely convenience, or is it something else? Is it safe, warm, inviting...in Jesus? and how do you transcend what happens inside to the outside?It seems to me your options would be to keep the people, but give them responsibility or get rid of the people. You have modern day leapers--health hazard, liability, nuisance. Questions---has anyone from the church spoken to the unhoused? Are they the same folks every night? In your new facility, could you offer restroom facilities at a certain time (for them to clean up), could you have a "lawn event" for the church "pot luck" style? This is a chance for a new ministry that perhaps the downtown could unite in---they need to hear your message---you are a vessel of Jesus that overflows---someone on that porch is there to know Jesus. I think of your blog about the open door---people are touched by the grace of MVP.

Still another acquaintance wrote, Having outreach to individuals has to be the first step. Adding lights and fences may work, but at a cost to the aesthetics of the building and to your sense of openness. On the other hand, reaching out to your neighbors is not only good scriptural sense, it is also good survival sense. If there are options for housing, then it would be appropriate to have social workers assist them in achieving housing. All actions are answers to questions: how do I protect myself tonight, where can I meet the needs of my addiction, etc. Understand the needs that are being met by each individual using the church property and focus attention there. Addressing people as individuals with needs will help them to respect you and your property more. Having boundaries about what is unacceptable is very appropriate: no drug use on the property, no defecating on the church steps, etc. These are the big concerns. At the same time, it is important to recognize that people are using the church as a shelter because it is the best option that they perceive themselves as having. Official overnight shelters work for some people, but don't work for many others for various legitimate reasons. Peer outreach by previously homeless or currently homeless is often a good strategy. Many successful programs use the strength of champion community members. Those homeless who use the property can stand up for the firm boundaries listed above. I do not buy in to the degree of danger that was listed in the report. Staying on church properties puts individuals at little more risk, if any, than where they would be staying otherwise. Assault on the homeless occurs anywhere else that they might be staying. Pushing homeless away without reaching out to them just means that they will be victimized where you can't see, which is of no benefit to them, only to you.

We have so much to consider. I have been powerfully reminded of how little outreach we have done for the individuals who sleep here at night. We have been blessed with the privilege of serving at so many places that serve the homeless. We have many people volunteering on a regular basis at many ministry sites in DC. But, we have done little to get to know the people who sleep here at night. We have done no more than to say "hello," or bring them leftovers, or invite them to church occasionally.

We started a new series on the Lord's Prayer yesterday. The entire sermon will be readable later today on our website. But, here is a portion of what was preached:

Our church staff has been wrestling mightily with how best to interact with our unhoused neighbors who are sleeping around the church. A man named Charles has been sleeping on one of the window ledges for the past several weeks. Two brothers have been on the porch for several weeks. Robert, a man who recently lost his job, has also made a temporary home for himself on the porch. These are the people we know. According to these individuals, there are many other people who are making the mess that is causing us so much concern – leaving piles of feces and puddles of urine on the porch and steps and in ever nook and cranny around the building.
In the middle of last week, after picking up trash and hosing down this mess once more, I was ready to throw my hands in the air and say, “to hell with these people.” Let’s bring back the gates. Let’s post signs all over telling people they are not welcome. Let’s do whatever we can to keep the poor off our property.
But, God has reminded me that it is not my property and nor is it our property. You and I are people who pray, “Our Father” each time we gather. If we are faithfully following this revolutionary Jesus then you and I must respond like this Jesus. No where in the gospels does Jesus put up gates, especially to keep people from coming to him. No where in the gospels does Jesus put up with religious folks who are trying to keep the hurt and the pain of the world from him. Instead, Jesus leaves the religious people in order to go embrace and heal the pain of the world that is brought to him. Time and again, Jesus upsets the religious authorities because of the company he keeps. The nature of following Jesus is that we deny ourselves and take up the cross – that we let go of our needs in order to embrace the needs with which Jesus was concerned. If we are living this prayer, then the gates and the bars designed to keep the poor away are no longer an option – at least for any building that is seeking to be a sign of the Kingdom of God. The options, instead, are the ones that take a little more time, a little more effort, and a little more compassionate contact as we seek to do justice, to love mercy and to walk humbly with our God.
Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be your name.

Following the sermon, one of our members came up and said, "Why are we hiring a Director of Music when we should be hiring a social worker to work with the homeless?"

I am not sure where our journey will lead. I do know, however, that God is not finished with me, our congregation, or the children of God who sleep on the porch at night. We're on a journey. I hope you will journey with us through your prayers or your presence. We serve a mighty God, and I cannot wait to see where God will lead us.

No Easy Answers

We have been struggling at Mount Vernon Place - struggling to discern how best to interact with our unhoused neighbors who dwell around the church.  I have been wrestling with what is hospitable and what is inhospitable, what is just and what is unjust.

Mount Vernon Place is a huge, monumental church.  There are large steps that lead to the sanctuary level, and there is a large, stone porch on two sides of the church.  This porch provides a good sleeping place for many of our unhoused neighbors.  It is protected from the wind or rain, high enough to keep one away from most of the rats, and above the street.  Many people have been coming to this place regularly.  Every morning we have to pick up cardboard boxes and debris.  And lately, we have had to clean up poop and pee almost every morning.  It has become a health hazard.  In addition to this mess being left, we now have many homeless people hanging out on the lawn of the church every day.  While there are many lawns all around us, a half a dozen people can be found taking a nap on the church lawn each afternoon.  Another person is asleep on the windowsill each morning.  And another person has been climbing a cooling tower to place their belongings.

I'm tired.  I'm at my wit's end.  My sense of hospitality is robbed each time I gag at the smell of poop while hosing down the steps.

We consulted someone else today, the head of the Downtown Cluster of Congregations.  Terry has suggested that we bring back the large gates that keep people off of the porch on both the Massachusetts Avenue side of the church and the 9th Street side.  He has suggested that we install a very short fence around the church's lawn - one that comes up to the shin.

These gates were present when I first got to Mount Vernon Place.  I found them to be an eyesore.  I found them to have a clear message, "Keep away."  I hated them.  I worked hard to have them removed.

But...Terry has told us we are asking for trouble.  We are creating a health hazard.  We are allowing illegal activity to take place on the porch as crack is being smoked.  We are allowing others to get too intoxicated at the top of the steps.  And, people are sleeping on and around human feces.  He event went so far to say that we are basically running an unsupervised homeless shelter with so many people around us - even when he visited this morning at 9:00 a.m.

There are no easy answers to urban ministry.  Situations like this one break my heart.  Again, I despise the gates.  But, I am learning that putting up boundaries might be the most just response - it might be the response that protects people from getting very sick or indulging in illegal drugs because they are out of sight from the people below.

And, as much as I want the church to be welcoming of all people, the church is also a place where a tremendous amount of work must be done.  Other businesses do not allow people to sleep all over the front lawn or door during the day.  Even homeless shelters do not allow this. So, why are we allowing this?

All of this sounds so harsh.  But perhaps in this case the harsh response is what is needed. Perhaps the harsh response is the just response.

What do you think?  I welcome your thoughts.  

And, if any of you want a lesson in humility, we are happy to loan you our hose and sign you up for morning duty.  You'll quickly discover how difficult things are.

The Beginning of the Fifth

I remember the day as clear as can be.  I pulled up to a building in disrepair - a yellow brick building with an air conditioning unit hanging out of every window.  The parking lot was small, but my spot, "PASTOR'S PARKING," was clearly marked.  I got out of my car, made my way to the door with large bars covering the glass, rang the bell, walked inside, and started the adventure.

I made my way up the stairs next to a make-shift handicap ramp that seemed much too steep to be safe, followed the signs that said, "Church Office This Way," and entered through the door with a little bell alerting all in the hallway that someone had arrived.  The moment I got inside the office, I quickly realized that it was lunchtime for the staff.  The smell of Wendy's chili and burgers was permeating the hallway.  No one got up from their seats to greet me.  Rather, they pointed me toward the door leading to the pastor's study and told me that someone would be on their way to help me with my boxes.  It was a "welcome" I'll always remember.

That was Thursday, three days before my first Sunday.  When Sunday came, many people did welcome me.  Many others looked skeptical, clearly wondering why a young woman had been sent to be their pastor.  One of the first questions I received on that Sunday was, "Pastor, we always sing patriotic songs on the first Sunday of July.  You have not chosen anything patriotic to sing, however.  We don't even get to say the Pledge of Allegiance today."  Following the sermon, the question my mother received is, "Is she always going to be this perky?"

On that day, there were about 130 people in the pews.  About 90 of the people were members of the Chinese Community Church, a church with whom we had been sharing a building, budget and the 11:00 worship service for over a decade.  The other 40 or so people were members of Mount Vernon Place - most of whom had been members of the church for at least 40 years with an average age of 82.  There was one person from MVP in their twenties.  I seemed to be the only person in my 30s.  I was so excited - I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that God had called me to this place.  And, I quickly realized how much work there was to do.  I followed a long line of pastors and people who had been telling the church that they were within ten years of closing - but I had not been called to close them.  I knew, with all of my heart, that God was about to do something real, remarkable, and holy.

We have come a long way since that day.  God has done something real, remarkable and holy.

As I begin my fifth year as the pastor of Mount Vernon Place United Methodist Church, my heart is filled with thanksgiving, awe and wonder.  I give thanks for the many people who have been coming to Mount Vernon Place since the 1940s and who continue to come - who continue to support this church faithfully with their prayers, their presence, their gifts, their service and their witness.

I give thanks for Mel, Heidi, Beth and Allyson - some of the first young adults to come to Mount Vernon Place - some of the first people to come to a church where there were few people their age - some of the first people to take a risk that more people their age would come.  These individuals were so faithful - so giving - so patient.  I'll always be grateful for them.  They prepared the foundation for the countless young adults who now come.

I give thanks for the extraordinary people who I have been privileged to be with - to journey with - at their end of life.  I thank God for people like Gilbert, Dorine, Louie, Marion, Carl, Frances, Harry and countless others who have allowed me to be part of their living and part of their dying and for their families who allowed me to be part of their celebration of life.

I give thanks for the new ministries that have emerged - the opportunities for service in our community, knitting prayer shawls, community small groups, an early morning prayer time, and many others.  I am also grateful for the individuals behind these ministries - the ways in which people have given so much of themselves to get something new started.

I give thanks for the ways in which worship has evolved.  We no longer stop right at noon.  We are no longer bound by a clock.  Rather, we see what God might have us to share, to do and to experience on any given Sunday.  I am so grateful for the ways in which people share on Sunday mornings - share in the passing of the peace, share what's on their hearts and minds, share in the joy of coming together to celebrate God's presence in our lives.

I give thanks for the building project that will be completed in two months.  That old building I first walked into has been demolished.  A new building, an extraordinarily beautiful building, is nearing completion, and we will soon occupy space in that building.  At the same time, a building that was finished in 1919 has been completely refinished.  I love our facility.  God has blessed us with so much.

I give thanks for the privilege of being the pastor at Mount Vernon Place.  There is nowhere else I would rather be than this place.  I cannot tell you how much I love this congregation,  these people, this city and this part of the city.

God, thank you for these past four years.  It's now the beginning of the fifth, and I cannot wait to see what you are going to do in and thru this place.  I am so thankful that you called me to be a pastor and that you allowed me to come here - to Mount Vernon Place.

Peter Storey

My former professor, hero, mentor, and spiritual giant is coming to speak at Mount Vernon Place on this Thursday, June 25 before continuing the conversation at Capitol Hill United Methodist Church on Friday, June 26. He'll be speaking at both churches from 7:00 - 9:00 p.m. on "Being the Body of Christ in a Place of Power and Poverty." The event is open to all; we would love to have you be with us for this two-part conversation.

In preparation for the event, I asked one of our members, Kevin, to share his thoughts on Dr. Storey. This is what Kevin wrote:

How Peter Storey changed my life by Kevin G. Feltz (short version)

Recently, at Mount Vernon Place UMC, I have joyously heard some individuals proclaim that they are interested in having a Christian life that is “authentic.” I surmise that what folks are referring to is the desire to live a life that is truly based upon the transforming work of the Holy Spirit and teachings of Christ; particularly concern for the poor, charity and community. I admire this because in our church lives, it can be easy to get busy and preoccupied with church attendance, committee membership, fitting in, etc. Not that there is inherently anything wrong with those things. But sometimes we can get so busy with playing church that we forget that as servants of the Most High God, we are called to be transformative agents in the world.

In my own personal evolution in these matters, the teachings of Peter Storey, in classes at Duke Divinity School, have been extremely influential. While he would never use this language, I think he might have been the first person to help me see the “BS” in my so-called Christian life, filled with “churchmanship.” A short survey of issues he felt were important for Christians to address reads like a laundry list of social justice topics: racism, homophobia, concern for the poor, changing unjust economic systems, the legitimate and illegitimate uses of power, etc. These are topics I did not encounter in Introduction to Biblical Hebrew or Early Church History. It was largely through these teachings that I decided I wanted the authentic Christian experience more than anything else.

I could write a lot about the specific lessons and topics, but for the sake of brevity, I will elaborate on just one example. One of the most consequential comments of Peter Storey that has stayed with me was the emphasis that in an authentic Christian life, we should strive to serve in a way that involves taking “vulnerable risk.” I can easily think of several situations in my life where I faced decisions and uncertainty with the words “vulnerable risk” echoing in my decision making process. Those words gave me courage to take the riskier route in big ways and small ways, at times putting myself in economic risk and others in physical risk. In the process, I was able to love and serve others and become transformed myself at least as much as they were.

For example, while I was employed as the Administrative Director at Christ House, it was my role to keep the peace among the dozens of homeless persons who came into our building each day. In was in my desire to love and serve, and with the words “vulnerable risk” a conscious part of my thinking, that I was able to place myself physically in between two angry, arguing, broken individuals, not knowing if they would both decide to attack me instead of each other. I did this somewhat regularly and there was one moment when I thought a man was going to slit my throat and that surely I would die, right there on the sidewalk in front of the place. Sure, I might have had these experiences without Peter Storey, but I would not have had the deep understanding of them and the passion for service to vulnerable populations.

So, if you truly desire to have an authentic Christian life, I encourage you to do everything you can to be in attendance the evenings of June 25 and 26. My life has been changed by the teachings of Peter Storey and I think yours will be too.

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your minds, so that you may discern what is the will of God-what is good and acceptable and perfect.” Romans 12:2

A Series of Interruptions

Earlier today, my colleagues and I were in a staff meeting when we heard a door open. As a downtown church, we try to make sure we are always fully aware of who is in the church. Since we are in the heart of Washington, we do not normally keep our doors unlocked but rather have people ring a doorbell whenever they are at the door.

After hearing the door open, my colleague, Chris, went into the lobby and found an older woman sitting there. She was overwhelmed and frustrated, having just realized that her cab dropped her off at 900 Massachusetts Ave. NW instead of 914 Massachusetts Ave. NE. She had paid her money and did not have enough money to get to the other side of town where she was supposed to be at a meeting.

I peaked out into the lobby, trying to discern what to do. I motioned to Chris, asking if he needed my help. My colleague, Carol, then went and started to pat the woman on the shoulder. The woman soon burst into tears, telling us more about what had happened and how she had just lost her nephew. Carol rubbed her arm up and down, offering her comfort. Chris got out his cell phone and called the cab company, asking that they come and rectify the situation. I stood and watched it, not knowing what to do.

Chris and Carol seized the opportunity to be like Christ. I froze in my tracks.

My colleagues offered extraordinary grace and assistance. I asked the woman how she got in.

When the staff meeting resumed, I was wondering who left the door open while my colleague said, "Thank God is was opened because no telling what would have happened to her."

My colleagues are motivating me to be a better disciple - a better participant in the Kingdom of God.

I have commended Carol twice just this week for how she has the uncanny ability to stop everything when someone wants a tour of the church. She rarely seems annoyed when someone stops and knocks on the door of the church - for a tour, financial help, or something else. In the meantime, I almost always see these people as interruptions - distractions - something that takes away from my job instead of something that is part of my job - part of my call, for God's sake!

Carol told me yesterday about a sign she used to hang on her desk at the company where she worked. It said, "I was always bothered by interruptions until I realized interruptions are my work."

I was always bothered by interruptions until I realized interruptions are my work.

Ministry is a series of interruptions. Ministry is a response to a God who loves to interrupt - a God who interrupted me when I thought I was on my way to law school - a God who interrupted me when I was loving my role as an associate pastor - a God who interrupted me when I was extraordinarily successful as a director of admissions - a God who, after all of these interruptions, led me to Mount Vernon Place where I have what I consider to be the best job ever. And this job is a job where I am called to respond to interruptions - where I am to pray that God will interrupt me, pulling me away from what is occupying my time and attention so that I might be used by God.

My work is a series of interruptions. My task now is to continue to take a few cues from my colleagues. Thank you, Chris and Carol, for your example.

God, help me to do better next time.

The Best Job in Washington

This afternoon afforded some of those moments when my only response is to think, "I cannot believe I get paid to do this work."  

I went to visit some of our older members.  Nancy is someone I affectionately call, "Spitfire, Junior."  The first Spitfire is a feisty 95-year-old named Lois.  Nancy comes in right behind her, however.  She has a dynamic personality.  She is funny, witty, and so unique.  I love visiting her. To give you the full understanding of who she is, I should confess that I once took a 20 ounce can of beer from a member who I knew was struggling with alcohol but who showed up at the church with a tall can of unopened beer, and I knew immediately what to do with it.  I brought it to Nancy.

I then stopped by the home of 100-year-old Mabel.  Mabel was the chair of the Staff Parish Relations Committee just 4 years ago when I arrived at Mount Vernon Place.  She is this extraordinary woman who always looks on the bright side.  She always offers words of support.  Without fail, a visit will include the words, "Donna, Washington needs Mount Vernon Place and Mount Vernon Place needs you."  She'll then say, "Do you know that you have the best job in Washington?"  If I were smart, I would probably visit Mabel at least once a week - she is food for the soul, bread for the journey.

As I think about these two extraordinary women who blessed my life on this day, I am also mourning the loss of a beloved church member who blessed my life on many other days.  Dorine died last Saturday, just five minutes after my husband, Craig, and I prayed with her.  I had no idea just how holy the ground was when we were there last week.  I wish now I would have stayed later.

I have grown incredibly close to Dorine over these last four years.  Her husband was sick soon after I arrived, and I would see the two of them almost weekly.  I was with Dorine when her husband died - with her when she held onto his body and did not want to let go.  I have since been with her in her home as she grieved the loss of her beloved.  And, I have seen her several times each month since last fall when she became ill.  Dorine was an amazing woman.  She had extraordinary beauty that radiated from the inside and the outside.  She had the ability to see the best in everyone.  She was an artist who was able to see creativity all around her.  And, she was an amazingly faithful church member.  She loved her church so much.  With the exception of when she was very, very weak, not a visit would pass when she would not pray for her church and her pastor.

This prayer time is what I will miss the most.  So often, I am always the one who prays - and this is an incredible privilege.  Yet, Dorine would always continue to hold my hand after I had said, "Amen."  She would then thank God for our church and then she would thank God for her pastor before specifically praying for God to grant me strength and wisdom and guidance.  Almost always, I would leave her with tears in my eyes because her prayer was just what I needed.  I'd give anything to hold her hand again today - to pray for her and then to be touched at the core by her prayers for me.

Thank you Nancy, Mabel and Dorine for all of the ways you have reminded me that I do, indeed, have the best job in Washington.

The H Corridor

A statement in the newest issue of Time Magazine, the June 1 issue, caught my attention today. The article is about the large wall that is being constructed on the edge of Jerusalem, separating Palestinians from Israelis. The wall is offensive and cruel to many people, separating families and businesses and livelihood. Still, the people who find the wall offensive are finding a way to change the wall. Many people are writing their own message on the wall, covering the wall with graffiti. One of the graffiti artists is quoted in the article. Faris Arouri says, "'To resist something, sometimes you have to interact with it'" (June 1, Time, page 6).

To resist something, sometimes you have to interact with it.

I read this statement over and over and over again this morning, trying to discern its full meaning. My mind then turned to a lecture I heard last week at the Festival of Homiletics.

On Tuesday, Tom Long, professor of preaching at the Candler School of Theology at Emory University, spoke. Dr. Long used Grady Memorial Hospital as one of the illustrations for his lecture. Grady Hospital was founded in 1890. It moved locations three times before reaching its current location. When the current facility was built in 1945, it was built as a segregated facility. Wings A and B, which faced the city, were built to serve white patients. Wings C and D, which faced the opposite direction, were built for black patients. The four wings were joined together by Wing E, a hallway connecting all four wings, forming a structure in the design of a large H. As a result of the two very separate sides, many people still refer to the hospital as "The Gradys." There were two distinct areas joined together by one hallway - a hallway that spoke volumes.

While many people have probably not thought much about that hallway, Tom Long explained how that hallway spoke of a vision - a dream for a different day. That hallway brought together that which had been separated as blacks and whites had to travel the hallway together. Wing E was shared by all people. The people who drew the plans for Grady Hospital knew that a collision was coming - a new day would dawn. The middle hallway, Wing E, demonstrated what was possible - it was a powerful interaction with walls of separation.

I talked about the Grady Hospital illustration often last week with my two roommates for the week, especially my dear colleague, Laurie who is the pastor of St. Luke's UMC in Columbus, Ohio. Laurie challenged me to apply my appreciation of Wing E, the H Corridor, to a current area of criticism I have for our church.

You see, I have long felt that our United Methodist Church's communication slogan, "Open Hearts, Open Minds and Open Doors" was filled with hypocrisy - a bunch of baloney. Too often, it has seemed as though the people who have this slogan printed on their business cards are the people who are fighting to keep our doors closed instead of opened to all people. Too often it seems as though the churches that are hanging banners broadcasting an "open" message are not all that open, at least in my eyes. I told Laurie last week how this slogan is a "bunch of B.S." But Laurie pushed me to think differently.

She explained how when the "Open Hearts" media campaign was first introduced that many people fought against it. Many people worked tirelessly to defeat it. The slogan was too open for many people in our denomination, and many people were not willing to open the doors that far. Still, the media campaign won approval. For many years now, the United Methodist Church has been proudly proclaiming that we are a church with "Open Hearts, Open Minds and Open Doors." It is a prophetic statement. It is a beautiful reality to live into - being a people whose hearts and minds and doors are open to all.

And while we are not there yet in all churches - perhaps the people behind this media campaign know a thing or two. Perhaps they are right. Perhaps if enough churches start proudly using and proclaiming this slogan then our hearts, minds and doors will be opened - further, wider, more gracefully and lovingly.

In the meantime, perhaps I need to open my mind a little - to what this slogan really means and the story behind it. Perhaps I need to interact more with that which I have been resisting for too long.

Thank you, Laurie, for your wisdom.